"If I were thinking clearly, Leonard, I would tell you that I wrestle alone in the dark, in the deep dark, and that only I can know. Only I can understand my condition. You live with the threat, you tell me you live with the threat of my extinction. Leonard, I live with it too." -Virgina Woolf

 "I remember one morning getting up at dawn, there was such a sense of possibility. You know, that feeling? And I remember thinking to myself: So, this is the beginning of happiness. This is where it starts. And of course there will always be more. It never occurred to me it wasn't the beginning. It was happiness. It was the moment. Right then." 

(THE HOURS)

"I don't know... the weight of it, I guess. At some point, it becomes bearable. It turns into something that you can crawl out from under and... carry around like a brick in your pocket. And you... you even forget it, for a while. But then you reach in for whatever reason and - there it is. Oh right, that." 

(RABBIT HOLE)

"All this while I've been packing ice around my heart. How do I make it melt?"

(cold mountain)

“I'm a person that carries everything that happened to me in my past, with me into the future. I refuse to let it make me bitter. I still completely believe in love and I remain open to anything that will happen to me,”

-Nicole Kidman

"You will never find a group of people who love one another more and who look after one another as lovingly as these friends do. You can give me any army, assembly of God and I would put my posse up against them, because they are so tight and fiercely loyal..."

"We cannot change our past. We can not change the fact that people act in a certain way. We can not change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude."

"I just tried to put myself in her place and figure out what would be the scariest thing. If I thought I might be dying. And it was being alone' ... 'To me,' she said, 'the scariest thing is oblivion. Being, and then not being." 

(Patricia Gaffney The Saving Graces)

Not Photographed By Me, Original Site

"I couldn't sleep last night because I know that it's over between us. I'm not bitter anymore, because I know that what we had was real. And if in some distant place in the future we see each other in our new lives, I'll smile at you with joy and remember how we spent the summer beneath the trees, learning from each other and growing in love. The best love is the kind that awakens the soul and makes us reach for more, that plants a fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds, and that's what you've given me. That's what I hope to give to you forever. I love you. I'll be seeing you. "

 -The Notebook

"When was the last time you wanted to say it all to the right person? To have it all come out right, to surprise yourself at how together you could be. When was the last time you ever met someone who made you want to give it all to them? I mean give yourself to them...

....Where you couldn't express yourself enough - like you wanted to cut off one of your arms to be understood. That's it - you would cut your head off to have someone understand you. You know how pointless that one is. You know how many times you've smashed yourself to bits on the rocks.”

"My feelings for you shame me into silence. The truth of this and your name will never be revealed. It is you who has made me realize the failure of my life. The thought of you fills me with longing and at the same time, a burning humiliation that produces scar tissue and dead brain cells. Your existence mocks me and I am unable to confront this. You have no idea of any of this. None of this is your fault. It is completely with me. It is you who makes me see what I really am. I am weak and out of touch with myself."

Quotes by Henry Rollins

I am in love with my life.

Okay, this may not be completely true...but in general, I really do love my life. I was about to go into specifics but I decided against it as the stories of my experiences are not completely mine to tell. But I have learned a lot about life through the inspection of the people around me and their struggles and triumphs...there have been many this year. It seems like an endless string of honest life events lately and I can't help but feel slightly in awe of the "bigger picture." So much is unknown, and I truly believe that life is a constant learning process. Dealing with what comes day to day is a challenge I'm learning to master...life is a constant balancing act. Appreciating every moment as an opportunity to learn and observe. So much of life is just dealing with it. The unplanned, the unexpected, and the unpredictable...that's what keeps things interesting. I feel blessed in so many ways and I feel challenged in all the same. I think challenges are blessings because they create a sense of character and force you into honest introspection. I have learned that LOVE can be shown in all types of ways and you are the only true judge of the sincerity of the love you give and only you can accept or reject the love that is shown to you. I feel so ridiculously in touch with myself. I feel so free and so fluid. There is an endless possibility of scenarios and I can't wait to discover my path. And It's an accomplishment because so often I feel incredibly lost. But lately even the things that don't really make sense have begun to seem logical. It's this perfect balance of understanding my thoughts and actions and being able to relate them to life in a really real way. I may be able to truly appreciate things I have never appreciated before, in this way.

Come on February, I'm ready!!!!!!!!!