“So many people live within unhappy circumstances and yet will not take the initiative to change their situation because they are conditioned to a life of security, conformity, and conservatism, all of which may appear to give one peace of mind, but in reality nothing is more damaging to the adventurous spirit within a man than a secure future.”

“There are certain queer times and occasions in this strange mixed affair we call life when a man takes this whole universe for avast practical joke, though the wit thereof he but dimly discerns, and more than suspects that the joke is at nobody's expense but his own. However, nothing dispirits, and nothing seems worth while disputing. He bolts down all events, all creeds, and beliefs, and persuasions, all hard things visible and invisible, never mind how knobby; as an ostrich of potent digestion gobbles down bullets and gun flints. And as for small difficulties and worryings, prospects of sudden disaster, peril of life and limb; all these, and death itself, seem to him only sly, good-natured hits, and jolly punches in the side bestowed by the unseen and unaccountable old joker. That odd sort of wayward mood I am am speaking of, comes over a man only in some time of extreme tribulation; it comes in the very midst of his earnestness, so that what just before might have seemed to him a thing most momentous, now seems but a part of the general joke.” 

― Herman Melville, Moby Dick

But we both know how,
How we're gonna make it work when it hurts,
When you pick yourself up,
You get kicked to the dirt,

Trying to make it work but,
Man, these times are hard,

But we're gonna start by
Drinking old cheap bottles of wine

“It’s not about the things he gave us, Carine,” he said softly. “It’s about the memories. You can’t touch those with your hands. Everything you can touch with your hands is just stuff.” 
― Carine McCandless, The Wild Truth

Dear city. Thank you for the raw honesty you forced. Thank you for the strange adventures and the unfamiliar faces. Thank you for creating a quiet unbreakable strength. Thank you for the opportunity of transformation. Thank you accepting with open arms. Thank you for creating an inner fight for all to be understood.

_{“I always try to play characters who are very different from what I am. If the character was a good swimmer or a diver, I’d be interested because in my real life, I am totally scared of water. I would immediately feel compelled to do it because I’m always trying to tackle any fear I have. I don’t want my life to be controlled by fear, whether it’s the fear of being rejected, fear of being loved; I want to run my life with open arms. Also, I never want to play the same character twice. To me, that’s soul crushing.” -Jessica Chastain}

So many things running through my head lately,

and i'll do my best to connect the dots in a clear coherent fashion.

Sometimes I think I have an insatiable appetite for inspiration.

Searching for it in all the usual ways,

but appearing in the most surprising places.

I've never known everything to be exactly as it seems,

and that's okay-because it keeps you accountable to life.

But let me tell you-

with the right inspiration an unbreakable motivation is created.

And this propels us forward into change,

new horizons,

transformation.

There are things more meaningful to me then I could ever express with words.

Things that have happened along the way.

The random occurrences of inspiration on great adventures.

Its never exactly the same,

maybe it's a conversation with a stranger on an airplane,

to distract a scared beginner.

Maybe it's an bright moon on an unfamiliar city street.

Maybe it's a sunset over a great city.

Maybe it's an angel in a taxi that shows you undeserved love.

Maybe it's a note or a text,

maybe it's the smell of ocean air on a summer night.

Lately it's been all different.

But if you think about the people in the world, as I often do,

there's all kinds.

But like Jack, I'm interested in the mad ones.

Those burning bright like roman candles.

And the fascination lies with the idea of achieving the dream.

That is-those who have found their place,

where they feel like everything in their life points to this direction,

where they overcome obstacle after obstacle,

and stand triumph at the top of their class.

Those that wake up each day and love every single moment,

because they are exactly where they want to be,

doing exactly what they want to do.

And I have to believe this is not an unobtainable future.

For everyone living right now with any sorts of dissatisfaction.

Believe me when I say-

you are the master of your fate.

Take charge of life and living and open yourself up to the possibility of change.

And believe me when I say-

I understand the fear associated with change,

I understand the fear associated with newness,

and I understand the fear associated with the unknown.

Maybe this is my addiction,

but I know no other way of living.

And even the most dedicated wanderer has to land somewhere,

and find some sort of community.

Because of Alexander Supertramp...Happiness is only real when shared.

But don't be crippled by circumstance.

And don't be paralyzed by fear.

I know the easy way is not always the best way.

Grow beyond what you thought were the limits,

because all of a sudden you'll realize you have become that person.

You'll wake up every single day knowing you are exactly where you are supposed to be,

doing exactly what you are supposed to be doing.

But sometimes it takes that inspiration,

to create a motivation to make changes.

It's not easy to relinquish control about your life.

But will you look back in ten years and tell yourself,

everything is going to be okay,

everything will work itself out.

Or will you look back and tell yourself,

enjoy this moment,

because as all things are, its just temporary,

and the next great moment is just around the corner.

So search in your present for inspiration to propel you into a future,

but don't discount how it happens.

Because each moment, opportunity, experience,

is simply a piece of the puzzle.

Each one matters.

And then you can look back with a better understanding of what it's all supposed to look like.

The mad ones,

burning, burning, burning,

like roman candles in the night.

Those are my people.

They walk alongside each other in a world where they are misunderstood.

People mislabel them as the lucky ones,

but it isn't luck.

Everyone wants results without putting the work.

So others resign to their own situation,

and the mad ones press on and on and on,

and there are so many sacrifices along the way.

But they are fed by the inspiration and fueled by motivation,

and all of sudden they are surrounded by all the success that they worked so hard to obtain,

And people set them apart in another category,

and create excuses about it all,

and really they started out all the same.

They just made different choices along the way.

They never took the easy way out.

They worked hard never compromising the vision they held in their head.

And they remained brave through transformation.

And somehow,

at some point,

in the midst of the hardest living,

life gave it all back.

And all the pieces of the puzzle came together.

I've been trying to see what it all looks like lately,

but I can't make sense of any of it yet.

Parts of the puzzle are clear,

but there are open blank spaces.

And the future has not become obvious,

and the past comes back around.

So for now,

I press onward.

I'm holding onto the little pieces of inspiration,

and consuming each experiences,

moving forward to the mad ones.

I'm keeping a faith in my journey,

I"m shedding myself of the past and preparing for the future.

I'm listening to my fears,

and I'm remaining brave towards the unknown.

Knowing each opportunity matters,

and living in the moment is just as important as striving towards goals.

Although inexperienced, unfinished, naive and ignorant to the wide wide world,

I am surrounded by veterans who have paved the way,

and i following behind large footsteps.

chasing after those who have become champions in their own arena.

And I'm studying and preparing to play the part,

and I'm learning everything I know from the great ones.

The mad ones.

And i'm keeping my city tucked close,

and I'm allowing those experiences to shape me even know,

because even years later you can learn hard lessons.

Its a good reminder that it all matters.

So deep breaths,

as you let these next moments pass make sure you take the time to find that inspiration,

make sure you appreciate being in the moments,

don't let fear cripple you,

don't be impatient.

Love harder,

grow bigger,

do your research and take notes,

because soon enough it will be that time again,

and you'll be closer to the person you want to be,

and you will be closer to finding your community of mad ones,

and life will fill in the rest of the blanks.