"I was screaming long live all the magic we made and bring on all the pretenders, I'm not afraid. Singing long live all the mountains we moved...

...I had the time of my life fighting dragons with you."

"What do you do? You laugh. I'm not saying I don't cry, but in between, I laugh. And I realize how silly it is to take anything too seriously. Plus, I look forward to a good cry. It feels pretty good..."

-Natalie Portman, Garden State

When you just need someone to remind you that it's all gonna be ok...

Where is this love? I cant see it, I cant touch it. I cant feel it. I can hear it. I can hear some words but I cant do anything with your easy words.

"Oh, as if you had no choice?

There's a moment, there's always a moment,

"I can do this, I can give into this, or I can resist it",

and I don't know when your moment was,

but I bet you there was one..."

Can you lose something if you never really had it to begin with?

Can you desire something that you detest?

Can you long for something without hope?

Can you love something that never existed?

ALL I SEE IS BLACK AND WHITE.

"When your worries, they won't let you sleep, and rob you of your days. And you've looked in all directions but you still can't find your way..."

When you just need someone to remind you that it's all gonna be ok, I will shine the light. I will shine the light.

-Shine the Light SUGARLAND

You and I walk a fragile line

I have known it all this time

But I never thought I'd live to see it break

It's getting dark

And it's all too quiet

And I can't trust anything now

And it's coming over you

Like it's all a big mistake

Oh holding my breath

Won't lose you again

Something's made your

Eyes go cold

Come on, come on

Don't leave me like this

I thought I had you figured out

Something's gone terribly wrong

You're all I wanted

Come on, come on

Don't leave me like this

I thought I had you figured out

Can't breathe whenever your gone

Can't turn back

Now I'm haunted

Stood there and watched you walk away

From everything we had

But I still mean every word I said

To you

-HAUNTED TAYLOR SWIFT (Speak Now)

I wonder how people fall in love. How they find that person they realize is the last piece to their missing puzzle...what does it take for someone to realize that every second of every day is incomplete without the sharing and partnership that soulmate-ship brings about? What does it take to lose yourself temporary as an individual to dedicate yourself to half of a whole? Why is partnership so emphasized in society...? What is it about being a solo individual that is so unappealing? Do we lack the ability to take care of ourselves enough to provide lifelong happiness for ourselves? Is it more about finding someone that makes breathing easier, laughter more frequent, and anxiety soothed? Does someone who lacks the ability to commit have a shot at making the ultimate commitment? How long does it take to fall in love...can it happen in a second? Does true love really last forever or can it die with change? Will you know this kind of endless eternal self-sacrificing love when you find it?

“The bravest are surely those who have the clearest vision of what is before them,

glory and danger alike,

and yet notwithstanding, go out to meet it.”

"Chaos is more freedom; in fact, total freedom. But no meaning. I want to be free to act, and I also want my actions to mean something" A. Niffenegger

“The self-confidence of the warrior is not the self-confidence of the average man. The average man seeks certainty in the eyes of the onlooker and calls that self-confidence. The warrior seeks impeccability in his own eyes and calls that humbleness. The average man is hooked to his fellow men, while the warrior is hooked only to infinity.”

-Carlos Castaneda

in·fi·nite

 [in-fuh-nit]

–adjective

1.

immeasurably great: an infinite capacity for forgiveness.

2.

indefinitely or exceedingly great: infinite sums of money.

3.

unlimited or unmeasurable in extent of space, duration oftime, etc.: the infinite nature of outer space.

4.

unbounded or unlimited; boundless; endless: God's infinitemercy.

"Say goodbye to my heart tonight. Here we are again-I feel the chemicals kickin' in. It's getting heavy and I wanna run and hide."

I've recently had this feeling like I am in the middle of experiencing both a beginning and an ending.

I find that in all this excitement to take forward steps,

I've looked behind me to see all the progress I made,

but I didn't look at all the things I was leaving behind.

I have been so desperate and successful at making changes quickly I realize now that I have moved closer to what is to come and farther from what was.

I no longer feel uncertain about many things I felt uncertain about before, but rather I feel extremely certain about things I couldn't even imagine before.

It's leaving me feeling like I'm floating around in an in-between space again. Not quite here fully, and not quite there fully. Not quite anywhere.

I have one foot in the past and one in the present.

I have a feeling November is about to teach me more about personal strength and dedication then anything I've learned thus far.

In love with September,

grateful for October,

anxious for November,

Excited for December.

I remember one morning getting up at dawn, there was such a sense of possibility.

You know, that feeling?

And I remember thinking to myself:

So, this is the beginning of happiness.

This is where it starts.

And of course there will always be more.

It never occurred to me it wasn't the beginning.

It was happiness.

It was the moment.

Right then.

-The Hours (2002) Meryl Streep

"To look life in the face, always, to look life in the face
and to know it for what it is.

At last to know it, to love it for what it is,

and then, to put it away."

-Virginia Woolf

I can only note that

the past is beautiful

because one never realises an emotion at the time.

It expands later,

and thus we don't have complete emotions about the present,

only about the past.

-Virginia Woolf